Reframing disappointment

Here's something I just found and I really do think it is true:

For everything you have missed, you have gained something else.

-- Ralph Waldo Emerson

Thursday Foundations class cancelled

Oh, I really didn't want to do this but I'm now convinced it's the path of wisdom.

I know the main streets are cleared but the neighborhood streets are not for the most part and there will undoubtedly be a lot of black ice even on the main streets tonight. I don't want anyone taking any unnecessary risks or getting hurt.

We're just going to need to call off this entire series of Foundations classes because there's no way, at this point, to make up all that we've missed by the time the course is scheduled to be over.

If you are a participant and have already paid the entire fee, please register with Cynthia (663-4747) for the next scheduled course. If that will not work for you, however, we will happily refund your money.

Once again: stay warm, stay safe, stay home! :-)

~~~

Possible Thursday cancellations

We are not going to make a decision about the Thursday evening Foundations class until tomorrow (Thursday) morning. Cynthia and I will assess the situation and post our decision at some point before 12:00 noon in the morning.

Needless to say, we would much rather not cancel class unless it seems truly necessary.

Do check here again by noon on the 10th.

Thanks for your patience!
~~~

Wednesday life form blogging

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Photo from Wikimedia Commons

Class cancellation

The Wednesday morning ongoing meditation class for February 9 is cancelled due to more (that's right, more!) snow.

Keep meditating, dear people.

And do send compassion and loving-kindness out to all beings (don't forget the animals) for whom the bitter cold we're experiencing along with the snow gives rise to suffering.

Peace be with you all.
~~~
UPDATE: Oh, I forgot to specify earlier: the Center is completely closed today so I'm unable to see people for individual appointments either.

Stay warm, stay safe, stay home!
~~~

Ah, those lessons

Most of you know how much I admire this teacher:

Maybe the only enemy is that we don't like reality the way it is now and therefore wish it would go away fast. But what we find as practitioners is that nothing ever goes away until it has taught us what we need to know.

-- Pema Chödrön

And the quotation above points to what, as far as I'm concerned, is the greatest encouragement and consolation of the meditative tradition. I refer, of course, to the teaching that it's all material, that nothing is ever wasted. Nothing, nothing, nothing is ever wasted.
~~~

Monday Meditative Picture Blogging

Photo from Wikimedia Commons

Book Club cancellation

With my very great regret (once more), we need to cancel the Book Club meeting tonight. I know the main streets are cleared but the street I live on is worse than ever. It has never been plowed and drivers created deep ruts in the snow yesterday which have now frozen over again making navigation to my house very difficult. Also there is no place to park. It is treacherous trying to get into my driveway and there is no on street parking at all.

SO, we'll try again on March 14 (the second Monday in March).

My sincere apologies.

Oh, and, by the way: if anyone tries to make it to the Center, be sure to park in front of the building where the parking lot has been cleared. The back upper parking lot (where most of us usually park) has not been plowed at all.

~~~

Friday cat blogging!

Meditating kitty!

Saturday class cancelled

Hello, Center participants.

With regret, I think it is wise to cancel class for Saturday morning, February 5.

I will miss you all!

Let's all stay warm and safe, okay?

Blessings to everybody.

Still snowed in

I'm sorry to say that the Center is still closed as of today (Thursday, Feb. 3). Tonight's Foundation Class is cancelled and I will be unable to see people for individual appointments as well.

I do recommed that we all meditate on the principle of impermance!

Take care, everybody, keep warm, be careful out there, and I'll see you soon.
~~~
PS: Here's a quotation for you to give you some material for reflection:

Life is. I am. Anything might happen. And I believe I may invest my life with meaning. The uncertainty is a blessing in disguise. If I were absolutely certain about all things, I would spend my life in anxious misery, fearful of losing my way. But since everything and anything are always possible, the miraculous is always nearby and wonders shall never, ever cease.

-- Robert Fulghum

That really a good point about certainty, isn't it?
~~~

Center closed due to weather

Hello participants of St. John's Center here in Tulsa:

Well, as will not surprise you, we are closed today and tonight due to the blizzard. No Tuesday night class and no individual appointments during the day today.

Stay tuned for our decision about tomorrow morning.

Be careful out there, okay?

Blessings to you all.
~~~
UPDATE: Well, we have a record-breaking accumulation of snow here in Tulsa so far and, from what I can observe (as of 3:00 pm), it's still snowing. SO. The Center will be closed tomorrow (Wednesday, Feb. 2) as well. That includes class and individual appointments.

Once more, everyone do be careful and stay safe.
~~~

Mindfulness meditation promotes happiness; positive thinking, not so much

This is excellent, I think:

Even one minute

This morning I came across a simple, ordinary little article entitled "30 Benefits of Meditation". It's nothing to write home about, really. Except that two sentences stood out to me as being both simply and effectively expressed:

Meditation can be simply sitting in a quiet room, concentrating on your breath slowly in and out, for no longer than a minute. Yes, even one minute can bring great benefits to your life.

This is true. Do trust me on this one!

I would only add that you not judge yourself regarding distractions.

You can go a long way on this approach all by itself.
~~~

Monday Meditative Picture Blogging

Photo from Wikimedia Commons

So, so funny!

You may wonder why I put this on a meditation blog. In my humble opinion, it beautifully illustrates both ego grasping and attachment to outcome. See if you can identify the two places I literally laughed out loud. Have fun!

A remedy for discouragement

I like this. A lot:

Don't let life discourage you; everyone who got where they are had to begin where they were.

-- Richard L. Evans

Friday cat blogging!

Photo from Wikimedia Commons

The practice of loving-kindness

The metta, or loving-kindness, meditation that I first learned goes like this:

May I be happy.
May I be well.
May everything be well in my life.

Then, that is extended:

May you be happy.
May you be well.
May everything be well in your life.

or

May he/she be happy
May he/she be well
May everything be well in his/her life.

Finally we open the circle to all beings everywhere:

May all beings be happy
May all beings be well.
May everything be well in their lives.

I must say, I do like the first focus on safety in the video above. This is especially supportive for anyone who has experienced trauma. (And, when you think about it, that's most of us.)
~~~

A place for candle meditation

I may have shared this before but, if so, it's been a long time.

Over on the very wonderful Gratefulness.org site, there's a series of pages where you can light a candle for whatever intention you wish. You can find that right here:

Light a Candle

You don't just click on a candle and that's it. The site guides you through a whole meditation that's very centering and soothing. At the very end you can stay and gaze upon your candle for as long as you wish. The candle actually flickers and provides a wonderful support for meditation.

I've been doing this every morning lately. It's a wonderful practice.
~~~

Wednesday life form blogging

Photo from Wikimedia Commons

Oh, that ego

Gosh. This really describes our basic predicament very well indeed:

The ego, as a collection of our past experiences, is continually offering miserable lines of thought. It’s as if there were a stream with little fish swimming by, and when we hook one of them there is a judgment. The ego is constantly judging everybody and everything. It has its constant little chit chat about things that can happen in the future, things about the past, too, and these are the little fish that swim by. And what we learn to do—this is why it takes work—is to not reach out and grab a fish.

-- Hugh Prather

Monday Meditative Picture Blogging

Photo from Wikimedia Commons

How appreciation works

The author of the passage below was a groundbreaking counselor and teacher of counselors. His influence has reached beyond his own field as his principles have also advanced the effectiveness of educators, pastors and spiritual directors. This really captures his whole approach to people and his craft:

One of the most satisfying experiences I know is fully to appreciate an individual in the same way I appreciate a sunset. When I look at a sunset...I don't find myself saying, 'Soften the orange a litle more on the right hand corner, and put a bit more purple along the base, and use a little more pink in the cloud color...' I don't try to control a sunset. I watch it with awe as it unfolds.

- Carl Rogers

Sunday art blogging

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Artist: Paul Cézanne

Image from Wikimedia Commons

The here and now

I just found a very fine article on meditation in the UK newspaper the Guardian. It has the very mundane title, "How to meditate: An introduction". Here are some bits I really appreciate:

The aim is simple: to pay attention – be "mindful". Typically, a teacher will ask you to sit upright, in an alert position. Then, they will encourage you to focus on something straightforward, like the in- and out-flow of breath. The aim is to nurture a curiosity about these sensations – not to explain them, but to know them.
...
Mindfulness, then, is not about ecstatic states, as if the marks of success are oceanic experiences or yogic flying. It's mostly pretty humdrum. Moreover, it is not a fast track to blissful happiness. It can, in fact, be quite unsettling, as works with painful experiences, to understand them better and thereby get to the root of problems.
...
Then, it's about knowing yourself better, something recognised as a crucial part of living well across a wide range of traditions. It's striking that today we often don't take the time to do so. Hence, perhaps, many of the ills of the western world.

I do recommend that you click through and read the whole article (which is quite short). The page also has links to a number of other resources for meditative practice.
~~~

Calming, soothing support

Friday cat blogging!

Photo from Wikimedia Commons

About choices and dreams

Sometimes I think that making peace with those circumstances about which we never had a choice can actually help us - empower us, really - to exercise those choices we do have:

All men and women are born, live suffer and die; what distinguishes us one from another is our dreams, whether they be dreams about worldly or unworldly things, and what we do to make them come about... We do not choose to be born. We do not choose our parents. We do not choose our historical epoch, the country of our birth, or the immediate circumstances of our upbringing. We do not, most of us, choose to die; nor do we choose the time and conditions of our death. But within this realm of choicelessness, we do choose how we live.

-- Joseph Epstein

Snow Announcement!

Hello, dear participants of St. John's Center.

Foundations class tonight (Thursday evening) is cancelled due to hazardous driving conditions. We will all discuss next week how to make up that time!

Everyone stay safe and I'll see you next week.

Blessings to all,

Ellie

The role of advice

Today, I stumbled upon an opinion piece in the New York Times entitled "What’s the Best Advice You Ever Got?" in which readers were encouraged to leave comments answering that question. I'm having a wonderful time reading the various offerings - and there are many. I certainly don't agree with all of them by any means. But exploring what different people consider to be good advice is a really interesting exercise in reflecting on my own values.

Do click through and give it a try. It's fun!

Needless to say, here's my favorite one so far:

Learn to meditate. Take a course, hire a teacher, whatever. Just learn to meditate.

Meditate.

Wednesday life form blogging

Photo from Wikimedia Commons

Contentment

I really like this one:

True contentment depends not upon what we have; a tub was large enough for Diogenes, but a world was too little for Alexander.

-- Charles Caleb Colton

Monday Meditative Picture Blogging

Martin Luther King Memorial, Uppsala, Sweden

Image from Wikimedia Commons

About getting into arguments

Ha. Just read it. Think about it:

I argue very well. Ask any of my remaining friends. I can win an argument on any topic, against any opponent. People know this and stay clear of me at parties. Often as a sign of their great respect, they don't even invite me.

-- Dave Barry

Now let's put Barry's observation together with the fundamental meditative principles of compassion, loving-kindness and equanimity.

Sunday art blogging

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Artist: Otto Scholderer

Image from Wikimedia Commons

This works wonderfully:

I learned progressive muscle relaxation many years ago - when I was in my 20s, actually. And I learned then that it is easier if you have someone guide you through it. I recommend bookmarking this little video and then using it to relax and recenter when you're wound up or anxious.

~~~

Well, THAT question is finally answered:

~

Friday cat blogging!

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Photo from Wikimedia Commons

Pain and the mind

A series of articles is gettings started today over on CNN in a section known as The Chart. Today's article is called Mind-body: How mental, physical pain are linked and it's by Dr. Charles Raison. Here's a bit of what he says:

...[W]hen it comes to health and well-being, it turns out that much of what science has discovered validates many ancient spiritual beliefs. I’ve been fortunate in my career to “cash in” on this fact by exploring how ancient meditative practices can be brought to bear to heal mind and body in the modern world. Working with inspirational figures like His Holiness the Dalai Lama has given me a profound sense of gratitude that we don’t have to throw our rational brains out the window when it comes to exploring how the life of the spirit can be used to better our lives.

Each of these posts will be structured around research that provide exciting new perspectives on mind-body issues.

And here's something on Dr. Raison's bio page:

He says that many people don't understand that the way they structure their thoughts, their relationships, and their physical conditioning will - over time - either promote well-being or contribute greatly to sickness and depression.

And, of course, we learn the kinds of skills by which we are able to structure our thoughts through meditative practice.

As you've heard me say many times: this stuff really works!

Why clinging is a problem

The following paragraph is from a little article called "The wisdom of surrender" that I found over on the Wildmind website:

Clinging, or holding on, is simply the attempt to stay with those things that we think are sources of happiness. Ultimately this is fruitless because everything changes. If I see a new relationship or a material object as sources of happiness, I’ll suffer when that relationship or material object change — as they inevitably will. It’s not that I can’t enjoy these things: in fact I’ll enjoy them more if I don’t cling to them, because I won’t be surprised and disappointed when they change.

It also helps to remember that what we are inclined to think is a source happiness probably isn't.

Wednesday life form blogging

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Photo by Cynthia Burgess

Noticing

This evening, in the ongoing meditation class, we talked about practicing reverence in terms of both respect and amazement. We saw how this can be prompted by things and experiences which, at first glance, may seem very ordinary and that we, therefore, tend to overlook. Here's something else about that:

If the things of this world neither delight nor threaten us they are often dismissed, ignored, or simply missed. The tree outside our window, made familiar by time, no longer appears to offer anything to attract our attention. We fail to notice the texture of its leaves, its changing colors, its growing and aging, the way the sun reflects on its leaves. We believe we need something more stimulating and exciting for it to be worthy of our attention. In learning to stay in the present, we discover that it is the power of our attention that makes all things worthy.

-- Christina Feldman

Monday meditative picture blogging

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Photo from Wikimedia Commons

One way of looking at how meditation helps

I found the following in the archives of a website called Meditation and Spiritual Growth:

For example, when we are walking on the beach and enjoying the sun we can take a stick and drag it through the sand. That creates a line or furrow. The harder we press the deeper the channel we create. That line remains in the sand and will stay there until the wind or surf eventually covers it back up. Now take that same stick and swipe it through water. You will notice that it also creates a line, with emanating ripples, but that will not last long. The impression in the water quickly disappears. Now take that same stick and swipe it through air. That also creates a line, we can feel the resulting wind, but that disappears even faster.

The continued practice of meditation expands our awareness and lessens the imprint (like a stick through air rather than sand) of experience on the mind. That is why through sustained practice of daily meditation life challenges and problems seems to become more manageable. They make less of an impact and fall more softly upon the mind. They don’t seem as catastrophic, earth shattering, or as important as they once were. We begin to see things with more perspective and clarity.

It's a wonderful illustration, don't you think? You can find the entire post right here.
~~~

Sunday art blogging

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Artist: Vladimir Ivanovich Ovchinnikov

Image from Wikimedia Commons

Acceptance of this moment

Just think, for a moment, about the stress that inevitably arises from the kind of struggle being described here:

When you struggle against this moment, you're actually struggling against the entire universe. Instead, you can make the decision that today you will not struggle against the whole universe by struggling against this moment. This means that your acceptance of this moment is total and complete. You accept things as they are, not as you wish they were in this moment. This is important to understand. You can wish for things in the future to be different, but in this moment you have to accept things as they are.

-- Deepak Chopra

Something about enlightenment

Demanding just doesn't work:

If we demand enlightenment, it hides. . . . All that we can do is make ourselves enlightenment-prone. We learn to treasure the possibility of awakening in all moments and circumstances. We learn to simplify and cultivate the receptivity of heart that can be touched by profound understanding. We learn to listen deeply and discover stillness amid the movement in our world.

-- Christina Feldman

I really like the idea of making ourselves "enlightenment-prone". It's a way of being proactive without triggering the likelihood of our getting all wound up about it.

Friday cat blogging!

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Photo from Wikimedia Commons

What is a moment?

I found this today over on Jade Page Press, a blog I have just rediscovered.

Highly recommended.

Wednesday life form blogging

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Photo from Wikimedia Commons

Mindfulness for a still mind

This is lovely and inspiring, I think.

Try to be mindful, and let things take their natural course. Then your mind will become still in any surroundings, like a clear forest pool. All kinds of wonderful, rare animals will come to drink at the pool, and you will clearly see the nature of all things. You will see many strange and wonderful things come and go, but you will be still.

-- Ajahn Chah

Monday meditative picture blogging

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Image from Wikimedia Commons

Struggling with a mirage

When you think about it carefully, attempting to do battle with that which is not real has to be defeating. Heres something about that:

If you can accept the flow of life and give in to it, you will be accepting what is real. Only when you accept what is real can you live with it in peace and happiness. The alternative is a struggle that will never end because it is a struggle with the unreal, with a mirage of life instead of life itself.

-- Deepak Chopra

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A resolution that's easy to keep!

Hello, everyone. I'm asking everyone who stops by this blog to read the following and help me out here:
~

A Very Easy Way to Help the Center

(with no cost to yourself)

I want to appeal to everyone who believes that St. John’s Center does good work here in Tulsa to check out GoodSearch (http://www.goodsearch.com/) along with its sister site, GoodShop (which you can access by clicking on the “Shop Now” button from the GoodSearch home page.)

~

GoodSearch is a search engine that gives 50% of its profits to the non-profit organization of a person’s choice. The Center is registered with them. The more you search, the more money we raise. It’s that simple!

All you do is go to the home page and fill in our entire name where it says “What charity do you goodsearch for?”

St. John’s Center for Spiritual Formation

Then click on the button that says “Verify”.

If you have cookies enabled, your computer will remember this.

The easiest way to use the search engine is to download its toolbar. Then you can easily click on it whenever you want to.

Even if you really love Google, we are asking our supporters to use GoodSearch at least part of the time – especially for really straightforward searches for which you don’t need a particularly powerful or sophisticated search engine. GoodSearch is powered by Yahoo so it’s a very good engine.

Also, GoodShop has a huge number of very fine and well known businesses listed if you like to order things on line. The Center will get an average of 3% per sale. (Many businesses offer much more than that.) The donations really add up!

We are a small non-profit organization and we operate on a shoestring. So we really need all the contributions we’re able to encourage.

If you have the toolbar already downloaded then whenever you do a search on an item you want to purchase, GoodShop participants will be highlighted in yellow on your search results. It’s so easy and it really helps us.

Thank you so much for reading this!

Every blessing to each one of you and Happy New Year!

Sr. Ellen E. Finlay
Executive Director
St. John’s Center for Spiritual Formation
~~~

More evidence

The folks at Care 2 sent me an email this morning that contained a link to an article with the following headline:

Meditation Affects Blood Flow to the Brain

Unsurprising, really.

Here's part of what it says:

Scientists at the Almanson-Lovelace Brain Mapping Center at the University of California Los Angeles studied the effects of meditation on the “stress” circuits of the brain. Ten experienced meditators performed two types of meditation: a focus-based meditative technique and a breath-based practice. The meditators’ brains were scanned using MRI technology before starting, during the meditation practices, and following meditation.

Researchers found that four regions of the brain were affected during meditation and there were different patterns of blood flow to the brain between the two types of meditation states; however, both techniques improved blood flow to the brain. Some of the brain changes continued even after meditation stopped.

You know, if you've been meditating for a while you can almost feel that happening.

Give yourself a wonderful gift for the new year! Meditate regularly. Think of it this way: you will not regret consistent meditation. You may well regret not bothering to meditate.

Observations, judgments, that sort of thing...

A friend of mine just sent me the following:

A young couple moved into a new neighborhood.

The next morning, while they were eating breakfast, the young woman saw her neighbor hanging the wash outside. "That laundry is not very clean," she said. "She doesn't know how to wash correctly. Perhaps she needs better laundry soap."

Her husband looked on, but remained silent. Every time her neighbor would hang her wash to dry, the young woman would make the same comments.

About one month later, the woman was surprised to see a nice clean wash on the line and said to her husband, "Look, she has learned how to wash correctly. I wonder who taught her this."

The husband said, "I got up early this morning and cleaned our windows."

And so it is with life. What we see when watching others depends on the window through which we look.

Of course, nobody hangs out wash anymore - at least in the United States. More's the pity.

Wednesday life form blogging

Photo from Wikimedia Commons

Something about the craving to understand

Here's a Zen saying that I may well have posted before but it certainly bears repeating:

If you understand, things are just as they are;
if you do not understand, things are just as they are.

If we ponder this a while, it can be a real help. I know many people are tormented when they don't understand something. Realizing that things are just as they are can help us let go of that craving to understand.

Monday meditative picture blogging

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Photo from Wikimedia Commons

Great thought from a great musician

I accept life unconditionally. Life holds so much--so much to be happy about always. Most people ask for happiness on condition. Happiness can be felt only if you don't set conditions.

-- Artur Rubinstein

To put this in meditation language, he is recommending that we learn to accept without judgment. It makes a huge difference in our sense of well being. Truly it does.

Sunday art blogging

Artist: André Dauthuille

Image from Wikimedia Commons

And let us not neglect kindness...

~
Well! We could label this a selfish reason for being unselfish, I guess. Take a look at this headline: ~
~
Can Kindness Cut the Risk of Heart Disease?

Here's an excerpt:

We produce [the hormone] oxytocin when we bond with each other. Having quality relationships increases its levels. But another way to bond with someone is through a simple act of kindness. And this might just be good for the heart.

Exciting research has revealed that oxytocin plays a powerful role throughout the cardiovascular system.

As well as being produced in the brain, it is also produced in the heart and travels throughout our blood vessels. There, it is believed to increase nitric oxide production (not nitrous oxide, which is laughing gas!). The nitric oxide then dilates our blood vessels, reducing blood pressure.
...
Research now shows that oxytocin also has a powerful effect on free radical and inflammation levels, which are two of the central culprits in coronary artery disease. Excess inflammation, for instance, leads to a buildup of arterial plaque that can result in a heart attack.

So. Loving-kindness is good for the heart. We've known that deep down for a long time, haven't we?

It's not only good for the heart, it's good for moving toward enlightenment.

You just can't beat a combination like that!
~~~

Joy on this day!

~

Friday cat blogging!

Photo from Wikimedia Commons

"It is, indeed, the season of regenerated feeling--the season for kindling, not merely the fire of hospitality in the hall, but the genial flame of charity in the heart."

-- Washington Irving

We. Are. Connected.

This is quite meaningful - if we will let it be so:

As we struggle with shopping lists and invitations, compounded by December's bad weather, it is good to be reminded that there are people in our lives who are worth this aggravation, and people to whom we are worth the same.

-- Donald E. Westlake

It's about connectedness, isn't it?

Here's something else in that regard:

Wednesday life form blogging

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Photo from Wikimedia Commons

Calming down

Beliefnet has a little article called "7 Quick Ways to Calm Down " that you might want to check out.

Here's one of the suggestions:

Years ago, I learned the "Four Square" method of breathing to reduce anxiety:

1. Breathe in slowly to a count of four.
2. Hold the breath for a count of four.
3. Exhale slowly through pursed lips to a count of four.
4. Rest for a count of four (without taking any breaths).
5. Take two normal breaths.
6. Start over again with number one

The other suggestions might be helpful to you as well. Check them out. It's good to have some strategies up our sleeve for this hectic time of the year!

Monday meditative picture blogging

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Photo from Wikimedia Commons

Why meditate?

I just came across a little article entitled "Why Learn to Meditate?" on a website called "How to Meditate". Here's how it gets started:

The purpose of meditation is to make our mind calm and peaceful. If our mind is peaceful, we will be free from worries and mental discomfort, and so we will experience true happiness; but if our mind is not peaceful, we will find it very difficult to be happy, even if we are living in the very best conditions. If we train in meditation, our mind will gradually become more and more peaceful, and we will experience a purer and purer form of happiness. Eventually, we will be able to stay happy all the time, even in the most difficult circumstances.

Do click through and read the rest of it. It's very short.

Sunday art blogging

Image from Wikimedia Commons

Ironic observation for the season

I've always loved Ogden Nash. Here's something I just discovered today. Somehow, it relates to meditative practice in my mind! :-)

People can't concentrate properly on blowing other people to pieces if their minds are poisoned by thoughts suitable to the twenty-fifth of December.

-- Ogden Nash

Advice concerning "the human problem"

I guess he wanted something that sounded really "profound" to say or maybe he wanted to come up with something no one else had thought of exactly. But this is it, actually. I do think so.

It is a bit embarrassing to have been concerned with the human problem all one's life and find at the end that one has no more to offer by way of advice than "try to be a little kinder".

-- Aldous Huxley

By the way, if you've never gotten around to spending some time with Huxley's The Perennial Philosophy, I highly recommend it.

Friday cat blogging!

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Photo from Wikimedia Commons

Still more on kindness

I have blogged the following quotation before, I know, because I remember that someone took issue with it. But since we're focusing on the subject of kindness this week it seemed appropriate to offer it again:

Beginning today, treat everyone you meet as if they were going to be dead by midnight. Extend to them all the care, kindness, and understanding you can muster, and do it with no thought of any reward. Your life will never be the same again.

-- Og Mandino

Here's one way of looking at it. A great many of the people that you meet or speak to in a given day are going to die before you do. Therefore, at some point in your life, something you say will turn out to be the last thing you say to that person. In most cases, we will never know when that is going to be.

Another way of looking at it is to ask if we would want our last words to someone or our last act toward someone to be words and acts of unkindness.

Wednesday life form blogging

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Photo from Wikimedia Commons

Kindness and regret

Very interesting that the founder of Forbes Magazine would say the following. I would imagine that he knew quite a few millionaires in his day:

I've never known any human being, high or humble, who ever regretted, when nearing life's end, having done kindly deeds. But I have known more than one millionaire who became haunted by the realization that they had led selfish lives.

--B. C. Forbes

Monday meditative picture blogging

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Photo from Wikimedia Commons

More on kindness

First of all, I want to ask you to check the comments to the post below (from yesterday) entitled "A way of living and walking through life". Really cool, huh?

Now, we continue our series on kindness. Let's begin by remembering that, according to the meditative tradition, the universal motivation is the wish to be happy. People do what they do because they are trying to be happy. They may, at times, be truly mistaken about what will actually advance that goal, but that's what they're doing fundamentally.

I think we can all see, therefore, how taking the following on board would not only help us in our aspirations but would revolutionize the world if enough people understood it or were simply willing to test it out:

Kindness is closely linked with happiness: the kinder you are to others, the happier you will be.

-- Mary Jaksch (Zen master and psychotherapist)

Sunday art blogging

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Artist: August Macke

Image from Wikimedia Commons

A way of living and walking through life

The Dalai Lama has famously been quoted as saying, "My religion is kindness." There's much to be said for that approach.

More than anything else, kindness is a way of life. It is a way of living and walking through life. It is a way of dealing with all that is--our selves, our bodies, our dreams and goals, our neighbors, our competitors, our enemies, our air, our earth, our animals, our space, our time, and our very consciousness. Do we treat all creation with kindness? Isn't all creation holy and divine?

- Jean Maalouf

I think it would be a good idea for us to focus on kindness for the next few days here at Meditation Matters. I'll see what I can find.

More about the present moment

This is the "one day at a time" principle. So, true; so consoling:

Anyone can carry his burden, however hard, until nightfall. Anyone can do his work, however hard, for one day. Anyone can live sweetly, patiently, lovingly, purely, until the sun goes down. And this is all that life really means.

-Robert Louis Stevenson

Friday cat blogging!

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Photo from Wikimedia Commons

Something about feelings

Many people assert to me that they can't do something unless they "feel like it". Here's something about that:

You cannot make yourself feel something you do not feel, but you can make yourself do right in spite of your feelings.

-- Pearl S. Buck

Something about regret

Slowly, slowly, I'm sorting through the leftovers from the Center's latest garage sale and deciding what to keep and what to give to Goodwill. This morning I came across a little paperpack book entitled The Joy of Being Human by Eugene Kennedy. Here's a short passage that caught my attention:

Beware if you find that you are blaming other persons for your own difficulties in life. This may be the chief sign by which to diagnose an imminent case of personal regret. The individual who continually justifies his or her own lack of initiative by accusing everyone of duplicity or bad faith in not giving the recognition he or she deserves is almost certainly going to end up bitter and regretful. This is not to say that injustice does not exist; it is to point to a pattern of passivity which puts the burden for our success or achievement on others rather than on ourselves.

Personally, I think this tends to happen because we've been socialized (at least in the U.S.) to believe that, if anything bad happens, someone has to be to blame. It's utterly demoralizing always to blame oneself and so people tend to look for someone else to blame. What would happen if we simply let go of the concept of blame as such altogether? Perhaps establishing blame is helpful from a legal point of view but it rarely supports our ability to heal and get on with our lives.

Wednesday life form blogging

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Photo from Wikimedia Commons

Change

One of the fundamental principles of meditative practice is acknowledging the reality of impermanence. It's intriguing, really, how we welcome change at times and are averse to it at others. Here's an interesting and somewhat wryly humorous way of looking at that:

There is a certain relief in change, even though it be from bad to worse; as I have found in travelling in a stage-coach, that it is often a comfort to shift one's position and be bruised in a new place.

-- Washington Irving

Both tender and profound

How lovely. How true:

Keep a good heart. That's the most important thing in life. It's not how much money you make or what you can acquire. The art of it is to keep a good heart.

-- Joni Mitchell

Monday meditative picture blogging

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Photo by Cynthia Burgess

I particularly value and appreciate images of gates, doors and windows (they are so symbolic of openness and movement) and so I was delighted when Cynthia sent me the above photo this morning.

Appreciating a blessing

The assertion that not appreciating a blessing is a tragedy strikes me as very true indeed:

In our current state of human development it remains unclear whether we will correct one of life's greatest tragedies, namely, the inability to appreciate a blessing until it is lost.

--Shmuley Boteach

Sunday art blogging

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Artist: August Macke

Image from Wikimedia Commons

Taking stock

How interesting. The Good Housekeeping website has a little feature called 52 ways to beat stress. Here's one of them:

Study Yourself: Ask yourself the following questions, preferably on a daily basis, to develop objectivity on how stress is affecting your life: How did I sleep? What is my mood? How did I respond when something unexpected happened? How does my body feel? Did I have any time to myself? Taking stock in this way can help you see your relationship with stress more clearly, which helps you develop a stress-reduction plan that fits your unique needs.

This is a mindfulness practice, isn't it? Consistent meditation will help us in both asking and answering these questions.

Keeping ourselves present

I get a lot of mileage each day from the "Care 2" site. Today a little article entitled 8 Morning Activities to Keep You Present All Day was offered. Needless to say, I approve of the first activity suggested:

1. Meditate in the morning, even if it’s only for five minutes. As soon as you get out of bed, sit in a comfortable position (away from your bed, to avoid the temptation of going back to sleep). Rather than mentally rushing through the daily to-do list or remorse over your poor quality of sleep, allow your mind to soak in the subtle noises that can only come from the start of a brand new day. Do you hear birds chirping, other family members cooking breakfast? Focus on your in breath and out breath, one lungful of air at a time. Do this every morning, and your days will feel sharper, clearer and more full of life.

Friday cat blogging!

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Photo by Cynthia Burgess

Assumptions

Here's a little quotation I found. There's a lot to this, you know:

Beware of assumptions! Whatever you assume to be possible -- or impossible will have a tendency to become real for you.

-- Source unknown

Listening

Compassion makes this possible. Yes, skill is involved as well, but compassion is the foundation:

When I have been listened to and when I have been heard, I am able to re-perceive my world in a new way and to go on. It is astonishing how elements that seem insoluble become soluble when someone listens, how confusions that seem irremediable turn into relatively clear flowing streams when one is heard. I have deeply appreciated the times that I have experienced this sensitive, empathic, concentrated listening.

-- Carl Rogers

Wednesday life form blogging

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Photo from Wikimedia Commons

The value of cultivating awarness

So true:

You got to be careful if you don't know where you're going, because you might not get there.

- Yogi Berra