Thursday, January 19, 2006


In my work, I see a lot of people who are impatient with themselves - who scold themselves for not living up to their own expectations. Part of the solution to this dynamic is to let go of the imaginary idealized self that a person concludes must be realized. But sometimes what the person really needs is self-forgiveness. Lama Surya Das speaks to this in his book, Awakening to the Sacred:
Often we need to begin our practice of forgiveness by simply becoming more gentle with ourselves. Saint Francis de Sales once wrote: "Be patient with everyone, but above all, with yourself... Do not be disheartened by your imperfections. How are we to be patient in dealing with our neighbor's faults if we are impatient in dealing with our own?"

I've noticed that people who are hard on themselves are often very judgmental about other people. Self-forgiveness is the key to learning to accept and forgive others. Really!

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