Radical self-acceptance really is the way. Here's part of a little reflection that I found on a Beliefnet blog:
For me, remaining in the moment is probably the most difficult thing in the world. When I try to meditate, it seems that my thoughts are bouncing off the walls.. I think the more I try to remain still, the less success I have.I think the person writing here is just a little bit optimistic in thinking that we will at some point no longer have to remind ourselves to be self-accepting. It is, however, quite realistic to have confidence that, as we practice, we will need to remind ourselves much less often.
Now I am working on acceptance. However I feel,.whatever, is happening, I remind myself myself to accept the present moment unconditionally. If am meditating, and not doing a good job of quieting my thoughts, I am learning to accept that. I remind myself many times during the day, to accept myself..
As I become less judgemental, I reduce the level of stress not only on me, but on people around me. In time, I will no longer have to remind myself to be self accepting, it will become natural.